Tag: movies

  • Movie Pass Adventures: Babes and Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

    Two movies in a day!

    Babes

    Babes movie bar

    You know how old low-budget R-rated sex comedies like to show boobs really early so you’ll spend the rest of the movie anticipating more? Babes does the same thing with raunchy language. Sure, it’s never puritanical, but it sure felt like the bulk of the naughty talk happens in the first fifteen minutes. The Required Meaningful Moments fall a little flat, but the funny stuff is strong enough to support the weak bits.

    Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

    Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes movie bar

    I was going to try and write a bunch of monkey puns, but it’s late and I should be asleep so you get two or three flat sentences that will do the required job without being offensive, but also without much to make them interesting. Which it turns out is a pretty good way to describe this film; no monkey business in this monkey business.

  • Movie Pass Adventures: Challengers

    Challengers movie par

    Do you like sweaty people? Thumping music? Different points in time marked by Zendaya’s haircuts? Balls (type: tennis)? Then I’ve got a movie for you!

    Also: I’m not a fan of exposition dump scenes, but I really needed someone to tell my non-sports brain the rules of tennis.

  • Movie Pass Adventures: The Fall Guy

    Ryan Gosling and Emily Blunt in The Fall Guy

    I expected a movie about a stunt guy directed by a stunt guy to be full of stunts, but there’s a lot more to enjoy here. The mystery plot isn’t much more than what you would have seen on the TV show that this is loosely based on, but that’s not important. What’s important: Gosling & Blunt have great chemistry, the depiction of the movie industry feels wildly cartoonish yet somehow believable, and most importantly the stunts are a blast. The end credits are what every stunt man movie needs: an eighties-Burt-Reynolds-movie style flashback of behind the scenes shots showing the real stunts behind the movie stunts. There’s also a mid-credits scene that’s exactly what you expect. I saw it in IMAX for maximum explodey goodness. Thumbs up!

  • Movie Pass Adventures: We Grown Now

    I really wanted to like this movie more. The lead kids have tons of charm, and their performances carry real weight when they aren’t trying to make the dialogue work. It’s not just them; the rest of the cast has to deal with the same problems. Add in some saccharine music and the whole thing falls apart. Even the color grading seems off, way more amber colored than the trailer.

    By the way, I seem to be in the minority on this one. It has really strong critic and audience ratings on Rotten Tomatoes, and a pretty strong showing on Metacritic.

  • Movie Pass Adventures- Double Dunst, Day 2: Spider-Man 2

    My brother and I saw the original 2002 Spider-Man movie in a theater last week, and it was great to see it with an audience. This week we went to Spider-Man 2, and the audience… sucked. Look, I know James Franco has been exposed as a less than stellar human, and I know his part is mighty melodramatic, but that doesn’t mean you should laugh every time he appears. Stay with the movie, people! I should have gone to the Alamo Drafthouse instead; audiences there are rarely jerks.

    Rosemary Harris is the Aunt Mayest of Aunt Mays. Her Aunt May is also mighty strong: she hangs from an umbrella off the side of a build for nearly two minutes! I couldn’t do that.

  • Alamo Drafthouse plays some wild stuff.

    A poster for "Alamo Mind Cinema" featuring images and titles of multiple imaginary movies, including Chubby Rain, Simple Jack, Satan's Alley, and Da Derp Dee Derp Da Teetley Derpee Derpee Dumb

    Update:

    Someone pointed out that a movie called “Bitter Harvest” was actually made a few years ago. If you want your poster of imaginary movies to avoid having real counterparts, steal this version instead:

    A poster for "Alamo Mind Cinema" featuring images and titles of multiple imaginary movies, including Chubby Rain, Simple Jack, Satan's Alley, and Da Derp Dee Derp Da Teetley Derpee Derpee Dumb. Bitter Harvest has been replaced by Habeas Corpus.
  • Movie Pass Adventures: Monkey Man

    Monkey Man movie bar

    Dev Patel plays kid, a homeless underground fighter with perfect teeth and a thirst for revenge. Watch and see how many different action movie references you can find! See if you can collect all the parts of The Hero’s Journey! And if you only take one lesson from this film, let it be this: Don’t mess with the Trans community.

    Lots of fun, but how can you make a movie called “Monkey Man” and not include the Rolling Stones song? Maybe it was in the end credits and I missed it.

  • Movie Pass Adventures: La Chimera

    La Chimera movie bar

    Advice: If you’re going to see three movies in three days, don’t watch the quiet subtitled foreign language film on day three after a no dialogue movie on day one and a frenetic tons of layered jokes film on day two.

    Also: if you are going to ignore this advice, make sure the day three movie is worth watching. La Chimera was worth the sudden lane change and gear shifting.

    What? That doesn’t seem like a review? Well, who told you this was a review blog?

  • Movie Pass Adventures: Wicked Little Letters, Used Cars

    Wicked Little Letters

    Wicked Little Letters movie bar

    This is not a movie to watch for the intricate plot or complex mystery. This is a movie to watch Jessie Buckley, Olivia Coleman, and the rest of the cast show off their character part chops. Some lovely swearing as well. Not at all “important,” but fun to watch.

    Used Cars

    Used Cars movie bar

    I bet I would have LOVED this movie forty years ago, but now I cringe at a ton of the jokes. Too much non-consensual nudity and casual racism for me.

  • Movie Pass Adventures: Love Lies Bleeding

    Love Lies Bleeding movie bar

    Look, I’m not totally delusional – I know that the only consistent reader of my posts is me. But I liked this movie a lot, and I really don’t want to spoil it by saying why I liked it, so I’m going to say pretty much nothing here except that this movie is exactly what you think it is, except sometimes it isn’t. It’s sort of like if Drive Away Dolls was more cohesive and darker, except it’s not really that either. Whatever it is, it’s full of style that doesn’t bury the substance.