Author: Ga2so

  • Movie Pass Adventures: A House of Dynamite

    Rebecca Ferguson in House of Dynamite
    Gabriel Basso in A House of Dynamite.

    I was worried when the movie started with a wall of text, then more worried when the Obviously Symbolic Dinosaur appeared, but the movie won me over as it ratcheted up the tension.

    Then it started over from a different viewpoint, and it mostly lost me.

    The it started over again from yet another viewpoint, and it pulled me back in a bit, but not all the way.

    Then it just… ended.

    I get what Bigelow was doing with the repetition. The first version is the full bureaucracy angle, showing all of the agencies coordinating to deal with the attack. The second version focuses more on the smaller group of people doing everything they can to avoid escalating the situation, and the third narrows even further to one man deciding whether to start a nuclear war. We see tons of people worrying about the consequences of their decisions, but we never see any of those consequences (and sometimes we don’t even see the decisions).

    …but maybe that’s my problem. Tons of people loved this movie. All I know is that I got one of my best/dumbest fake movie posters out of it.

    A fake poster for A House of Dynamite mimicking the poster for Napoleon Dynamite.
    Fediverse reactions

  • Botober day 11: catsian spinach.

    a drawing of a cat looking at a can of spinach. Text on image reads: CAT SEEIN' SPINACH IT'S LATE. I'M TIRED. JUST ACCEPT IT. ALSO: ONE OF MY CATS LOVES SPINACH. FREAK. BOTOBER 25 11: CATSIAN SPINACH

    Note to self: remember to draw these before 11 at night.

  • Walk of Fame Movie Adventures: The Westerner and Fred Stone

    Walter Brennan and Gary Cooper leaning in to talk over a bar .
    Gray Cooper's head and a horse's ears.

    Gary Cooper was forced to make this. He didn’t want to do it because he thought you couldn’t have a western without gunfights. There is one gunfight at the end, and I wonder if that was added to appease him.

    …and it’s really more of a love story between Cooper and Walter Brennan, who plays the friendly murderous judge with charm Cooper can’t resist. Oh, you’re supposed to think he loves Doris Davenport, but Brennan’s the one he spends the most time with- and wakes up with in bed.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Fred Stone's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the Right, a black and white portrait photo of Fred Stone.

    Fred Stone (Walk of Fame: 1634 Vine Street) plays Davenport’s father. He was best known as a stage performer. He was the first person to play The Scarecrow in a stage production of The Wizard of Oz.

    Black and White photo of Fred Stone dressed as the Scarecrow from the stage production of The Wizard of Oz.
    …and he looked pretty freaking cool!

    I’m not sure how this movie connects to a movie about an Australian woman obsessed with ABBA and weddings, but here you go:

    A fake poster for The Westerner mimicking the poster for Muriel's Wedding.
    Fediverse reactions

  • Walk of Fame Movie Adventures: Doctor X and Lee Tracy

    The monster from Doctor X shown in high contrast with bright solid color overlays.
    Lee Tracy and Fay Wray on the beach in Doctor X.

    Two words:

    SYNTHETIC FLESSSSHHHHHHH!

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Lee Tracy's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the Right, a black and white portrait photo of Lee Tracy.

    Lee Tracy (star at 1634 Vine Street) plays an obnoxious reporter who saves the day with the power of cheap magic shop pranks.

    Today’s fake poster is all about tic-tac-toe.

    A fake poster for Doctor X mimicking the poster for The Story of O.
    Fediverse reactions

  • Botober Day 10: 1/4 can cool soup

    Line drawing. At the top are the words "CSI: PANTRY." Below that is a can of gazpacho wearing sunglasses. The top fourth of the can is torn off and sitting to the right of the bottom. Text above the torn top reads: "The victim is Jimmy 'Gaz' Gazpacho, a second shelf staple. Our unsub is a person with an extreme dislike of can openers." "HE'S A DMAN MONSTER!" "You need to cool down." Text below reads "BOTOBER 25 10: 1/4 can cool soup"

    There’s a good joke buried in there somewhere.

    Fediverse reactions

  • Botober Day 9: small sweet pipes

    Line Drawing. Text at the top reads "WILLY WONKA REVIEWS THE BLUEPRINTS FOR HIS NEW FACTORY" Wonka is at a table holding up a large paper, and is saying "Oh, this will never do! I couldn't fit a fat kid through that pipe." The bottom of the picture is labeled "BOTOBER 25 9: SMALL SWEET PIPES"

    This was an “oh yeah, I need to draw something before I go to bed” thing. That’s why Wonka’s office is empty and he looks like he borrowed a suit from David Byrne.

    Fediverse reactions

  • Botober Day 8: ground mayonnaise

    A lame line drawing of a messy kitchen. Text reads "Welcome to another edition of AMERICA'S MESSIEST KITCHEN!" A blob on the floor is labelled "GROUND MAYONNAISE." A blob on the ceiling is labeled "ceiling sauce." A bag against the wall is labeled "wall flour." The bag is saying "it has its perks." labels at the bottom read "BOTOBER 25 8: GROUND MAYONNAISE"

    I blame the bad drawing and weak pun on post COVID/flu vaccination symptoms. I’m glad that excuse came up when I needed it!

    Fediverse reactions

  • Botober Day 7: Behold onion.

    Line drawing of an onion with a large central eye and an open mouth full of spiky teeth. Six stalks with eyes looking in different directions are growing from the top of the onion. Text around the onion reads "I SEEK REVENGE ON OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE! BRING ME... A BLOOMIN' HUMAN!" Text at the bottom reads "BOTOBER 25 7: BEHOLD ONION."

    This one’s for the D&D nerds.

    Fediverse reactions

  • Botober Day 6: sozerfrapple

    Line drawing of five apples in a police lineup. Text above them reads: "All right, which one is Keyser Sozerfrapple?" Text below reads: BOTOBER 25 THE BAD APPLES 6: Sozerfrapple

    I never said these drawings would be good, or make sense.

    I did a better riff on this for a different project.

  • Movie Pass Adventures: The Smashing Machine

    Dwayne Johnson as Mark Kerr, sitting on the floor of a gym in The Smashing Machine.
    The eyes of Dwayne Johnson as Mark Kerr in The Smashing Machine.

    I think there’s an episode of Leave it to Beaver where someone tells The Beav that he can fake crying by putting his hands on this face and laughing. That what I thought of when The Rock breaks down in this movie. And I kept waiting for Emily Blunt to threaten to take the kids to her sister’s.

    Honestly, this movie is fine, but there are at least two wrestlers-turned-actors currently working with stronger acting skills than Dwayne Johnson.

    Do you think you can figure out the original version of this fake poster without peeking at the alt text? I THINK KNOTT!

    A fake poster for The Smashing Machine mimicking the poster for The Incredible Mr. Limpet.
    Fediverse reactions
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