After I saw this I heard some people outside the theater complaining that there was too much setup and flashback and not enough fighting- which is weird, because the whole point of this movie is that this couple is actually deeply in love, but they’re terrible at it.
Today’s poster inspiration was an obvious choice for fans of late seventies Bette Midler.
Some things that never happen in real life that happen for extra drama in this movie:
The most amazing thing about this movie: it doesn’t end when the chorus girl finishes her triumphant performance. In the last scene (and yes, I’m about to spoil the ending of a 92 year old movie) the director, who has worked himself nearly to death to complete the play and secure his future, stands outside the theater. Weak and unrecognized, people pass him saying that he deserves no credit and that the chorus girl is the reason the show works. And then the credits roll! Way darker than I ‘d expect, but maybe Depression era audiences were primed for that little gut punch.
And why does this movie hate Philadelphia?
I’m not sure exactly where Una Merle’s star is. The Walk of Fame directory says 6262 Hollywood Boulevard, but Wikipedia claims 6230. I guess I’ll have to go look.
It looks like the poster I copied for this was a linocut, and I wasn’t up for spending a day or two replicating the effect accurately, so I faked it. Close enough if you don’t look too hard.
This movie is incredibly gross and dumb, and I loved it. If you can laugh at over the top gore, you might be the target audience.
Today’s fake poster originally was going to be a knockoff MCU Avengers thing, but I saw this shot of Peter Dinklage and knew what had to be done.
If you ever have to become a ghost, it seems like the ones in Topper are the most pleasant. You’re basically the Invisible Woman from the Fantastic Four, without the force fields but with bonus intangibility powers.
Constance Bennett spends most of the movie hitting on Roland Young (who, despite what the billing says, is the real star of this movie).
Today’s fake poster is completely based on slant rhyme.
That litter box was way too small for that cat.
Today’s fake poster is really, really, really, ridiculously good-looking.
I’ve never watched Laurel & hardy, but based on this movie, this seems to be the formula for most of their comedy:
Can you tell which one I thought was funnier?
William Seiter’s Wikipedia entry says “Seiter earned a reputation for his charming comedies that were moderately paced and kept the laughs coming quietly, rather than resorting to obvious jokes and slapstick.” He must have abandoned that for this movie.
…and now it’s time for another “you’ll only know the reference if you’re a movie poster fanatic” fake poster!
Marilyn Monroe with glasses is so much hotter than Marilyn Monroe without them. However, I did appreciate that her vanity about being seen wearing them explained that a lot of her ditziness and clumsiness was actually symptoms of blindness.
This was one of the first CinemaScope pictures, and you can tell by the opening scene: a five minute performance by a full orchestra that has nothing to do with the story. They obviously thought “Hey, we’ve got a really wide screen- what’s a really wide thing with impressive sound we can film?”
How to Marry a Millionaire was directed by Jean Negulesco. He received his star at 6212 Hollywood Boulevard on February 8, 1960. He was one year older than I am now, so I’m hoping I get my star next year.
Today’s fake poster is based on a slightly different movie about relationships.
Gordon Hollingshead was mainly a producer of short films, so many that he was nominated twenty times for Best Short Subject Academy Awards (and won about a half dozen).
I’ve been using Justwatch to find this to see for this project, and the only Hollingshead thing it listed as available on any streaming service I have was “Why We Fight: Divide and Conquer,” one of Frank Capra’s WWII propaganda films. Pretty straightforward stuff.
No poster for this (it’s a short, not a full film) but I did make this loop:
Of course, after I watched this I looked on youtube and found a ton of shorts he worked on, including this cool one about jazz:
Hollingshead’s star is at 6200 Hollywood Boulevard, which means that in the month I’ve been doing this I’ve gone TWO WHOLE BLOCKS! Eleven more unseen movies (and way more already-seen ones) until I get to Hollywood & Vine!
Godzilla vs. bureaucracy. The soundtrack often has to drum up excitement in scenes of middle management meetings:
*BOMPATA-BOMPATA-BOMBOMBOMBPA*
“Inform the Prime Minister that the meeting with the Zoning Commission will happen at 11:00.”
“But that overlaps his meeting with the Sewage Line Planning Committee.”
*BOMPATA-BOMPATA-BOMBOMBOMBPA*
“Push the SLPC to noon.”
“But what about lunch?”
“LUNCH WILL HAVE TO WAIT.”
*BOMPATA-BOMPATA-BOMBOMBOMBPA BOW BOW BOW BAAAAWW!*
But it works!
Today’s fake poster is based on another movie about hunting a monster.
A classic “You know who should be in charge of this Arabic country? The British” film. Lots of macho men and kept women.
I went through three different sources for this before I found a decent free print.
Valentino’s popularity was dropping when this came out, but then he died on the press tour and this movie became huge. He has a great face, but he looks better when you don’t see the rest of his head.
Bonus: there’s a pretty big part for Karl Dane– much larger than the film I specifically watched to see him.
Today’s fake poster is from another movie that uses the “[blank] of the [blank]” format.
