Category: movies

  • Walk of Fame Movies: The Garden of Eden and Corinne Griffith

    Charles Ray and Corinne Griffith in The Garden of Eden
    Corinne Griffith, Lowell Sherman, and Maude George in The Garden of Eden

    If movies had nutritional value, this would be a bowl of Cap’n Crunch.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Corinne Griffith's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Corinne Griffith.

    …but if they made a movie about Corinne Griffith it would be a steak dinner. She was a real estate tycoon. She married multiple times, and during one divorce proceeding she tried to get out of paying alimony by claiming that Corinne Griffith was dead and she was actually Corinne’s little sister. And later she changed her story and claimed that she was Mary, Corinne’s identical twin, who took over her sister’s life when Corinne unexpectedly died in Mexico. Billy Wilder’s second to last film Fedora was inspired by her story.

    Today’s fake poster:

    A fake poster for The Garden of Eden mimicking the poster for The Running Man (1987).
  • Walk of Fame Movies: Meet John Doe, Rod La Rocque, and a progress update

    Gary Cooper and Barbara Stanwyck in Meet John Doe.
    Gary Cooper and Barbara Stanwyck embrace while a group of men watch in Meet John Doe.

    A movie made by a very conservative director starring two very conservative actors that says you can’t trust the rich and you can’t stop ordinary people from doing good. I wonder how they’d feel about today’s political climate?

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Rod La Rocque's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Rod La Rocque.

    Rod La Rocque (1580 Vine Street) plays Ted Sheldon, the nephew of the richest man in the movie, and the closest thing Gary Cooper has to a romantic rival. In real life he had been a popular silent film star ho transitioned into character roles in talkies, then retired in his fifties. His marriage to fellow silent film star Vilma Banky (who I recently saw in Son of the Sheik) was huge, and they stayed together until his death in 1977.

    Today’s fake poster is another “Meet [name of person]” movie, but I doubt anyone will recognize it.

    A fake poster for Meet John Doe mimicking the poster for Meet Wally Sparks.

    Walk of Fame Progress Report

    A map of my progress seeing movies for every motion picture star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. The entire walk (Hollywood Blvd from Gower to La Brea, Vine St from Franklin to Sunset) is highlighted. most of it is yellow, but the south side of Hollywood from Gower to Vine and the east side of Vine from Hollywood to just south of Selma is red.

    Depending on how you look at it, I’m either very far along or just getting started. There are 1227 motion picture stars. If you look at contiguous stars, I’ve only completed 142, or about 11.5%. That’s the part in red. But if you don’t worry about them touching, I’ve seen 876, about 71%. And a lot of these old movies cover more than one star, so it should only go faster as I see more stuff. That’s good, because at the rate I’m going this thing is going to take me four years!

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  • Walk of Fame Movies: Hell’s Highway and Richard Dix

    Richard Dix in Hell's Highway (1932).
    Stabnley Fiields, Richard Dix, and Tom Brown in Hell's Highway.

    Whoever designed the original poster for this sure had fun adding not-very subtle subtext:

    The original poster for Hell's Highway (1932)
    Nothing to see here. Just a man named Richard Dix, in chains, turned away from the viewer, with “Hell’s Highway” written across his butt.
    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Richard Dix's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Richard Dix.

    Richard Dix (1608 Vine Street) is Duke, a bank robber on a brutal chain gang. He plans an escape, but when Johnny, his brother, gets put in the same gang, Duke decides to stay in to protect him. He doesn’t do a great job.

    Today’s fake poster is a David Lynch ripoff:

    A fake poster for Hell's Highway mimicking the poster for Lost Highway.
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  • Movie Pass Adventures: It Was Just an Accident

    Vahid Mobasseri in It Was Just an Accident.
    Mariam Afshari in It Was Just an Accident.

    Jafar Panahi is a braver man than me.

    Today’s fake poster:

    A fake poster for It Was Just an Accident mimicking the poster for The Doom Generation.
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  • Walk of Fame Movie Adventures: The Blue Gardenia and Ann Sothern

    Anne Baxter in The Blue Gardenia.
    Anne Baxter and Richard Conte in The Blue Gardenia.

    Anne Baxter thinks she murdered a very creepy Raymond Burr, but isn’t sure because she got blackout drunk on Polynesian Pearl Divers. My favorite part is when she uses a handkerchief over the the mouthpiece of a phone to disguise her voice, and it totally works. It turns out Detective Drebin was right.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Ann Sothern's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Ann Sothern.

    Ann Sothern (1600 Vine Street) plays one of Baxter’s roommates. The location of the fictional bar where Burr gets Baxter drunk is actually very close to Sothern’s star. This was filmed right around when she moved from film to television. I’m sure we all remember her best as the voice of the car in My Mother The Car.

    Today’s fake poster is the second one I’ve done that’s based on a “classy” adult movie, but the other one is better.

    A fake poster for The Blue Gardenia mimicking the poster for Behind the Green Door.
    Maybe I should have changed it to blue to match the title.

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  • Movie Pass Adventures: Roofman

    Channing Tatum in Roofman.
    Channing Tatum and Kirsten Dunst in Roofman.

    When I see the title “Roofman” my brain starts playing a parody of Soundgarden’s “Spoon Man.”

    Straightforward, fun movie.

    And I’m pretty happy with today’s fake poster.

    A fake poster for Roofman mimicking the poster for The Wolfman.
  • Movie Pass Adventures: Die My Love

    A Negative image of Jennifer Lawrence rendered in reds and yellows on a light blue and gray background.
    Jennifer Lawrence and Robert Pattison in Die My Love

    Jennifer Lawrence is really good at finding projects that give her new ways to be miserable. She’s also really good at playing those parts, so it all works out.

    Good Golly, it’s a fake poster!

    A fake poster for Die My Love mimicking the poster for East of Eden.
    Whoever made the original version of this sure likes breaking design rules!
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  • Walk of Fame Adventures: The Death Kiss and Adrienne Ames

    Adrienne Ames and Bela Lugosi in The Death Kiss.
    David Manners, Adrienne Ames, and Bela Lugosi in The Death Kiss.

    The hero of this movie is a screenwriter who’s a better detective than the cops, contaminates evidence without consequence, solves the crime, and gets the girl. These days he’d be called a Mary Sue (or maybe a Gary Stu).

    It’s not a great movie, but it’s fun to see three of the leads from Dracula in wildly different roles.

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Adrienne Ames's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Adrienne Ames.

    Adrienne Ames (1612 Vine Street) plays the main suspect, an actress who was recently divorced from the murder victim. In real life she had already been divorced twice, even though she was only in her early twenties. Her first marriage happened when she was 13 or 14. Gross.

    Today’s fake poster isn’t very complex, but it did amuse me.

    A fake poster for The Death Kiss mimicking the poster for Deep Throat.
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  • Streaming Movie Adventures: The Punk Singer

    Kathleen Hanna in The Punk Singer.
    Kathleen Hanna in The Punk Singer.

    This gets a little fawning, but how could it not? It’s about Kathleen Hanna, a prime architect of everything cool in the 90s. My biggest complaint: They never revealed if Le Tigre was named after the knockoff Izod shirt that J. C. Penney used to sell.

    Today’s fake poster was almost based on The Wedding Singer, but I liked this one more.

    A fake poster for The Punk Singer mimicking the poster for the  Neil Diamond version of The Jazz Singer.
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  • Walk of Fame Movie Adventures: Carmen and Geraldine Farrar

    Geraldine Farrar and Wallace Reid in Carmen
    Geraldine Farrar in a fight in Carmen

    There’s something funny about making a silent movie based on an opera…

    Composite picture. On the left, a mockup of Geraldine Farrar's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. On the right, a black and white portrait photo of Geraldine Farrar.

    …and it’s funnier when you cast an opera singer as the lead. That’s a little unfair: Geraldine Farrar (1620 Vine Street) was popular enough to have her own version of Swifties.

    Today’s poster is based on a different staged music production that was made into a movie.

    A fake poster for Carmen mimicking the poster for Cabaret.
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