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Bike Mortal Enemy ridesfv

A WINNER IS ME!

My Mortal Foe, Daniel Quinn: VANQUISHED!

Peep this:

DEVASTATING. YOU’RE DEVASTATED.

TWENTY FIVE POINT TWO PERCENT. Pity poor Daniel Quinn, for his paltry 25.02% of the Valley has been crushed.

This is me:

…and this is PATHETIC HAS BEEN DANIEL QUINN:

At this point, the only way he could possibly catch me is if he rode SEVEN MILES. IMPOSSIBLE! NO MAN CAN RIDE SEVEN MILES AND LIVE TO TELL THE TALE.

My glory will never be surpassed!

The killing blow:

Now go and tell the world of this glorious day!

(maybe don’t tell Daniel)

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